Almost lost....

If you are familiar with George Carlin, you will know this!

THE MOST FUNCTIONAL ENGLISH WORD ...   HOPE THIS MAKES YOU SMILE THE MOST FUNCTIONAL ENGLISH WORD Well, it's shit ... that's right , shit! Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language. You can smoke shit, buy shit, sell shit, lose shit, find shit, forget shit, and tell others to eat shit. Some people know their shit, while others can't tell the difference between shit and shineola.     There are lucky shits, dumb shits, and crazy shits. There is bull shit, horse shit, and chicken shit.   You can throw shit, sling shit, catch shit, shoot the shit, or duck when the shit hits the fan.            &nb sp;      You can give a shit or serve shit on a shingle. You can find yourself in deep shit or be happier than a pig in shit Some days are colder than shit, some days are hotter than shit, and some days are just plain shitty.   Some music sounds like shit, things can look like shit, and there are times when you feel like shit. You can have too much shit, not enough shit, the right shit, the wrong shit or a lot of weird shit. You can carry shit, have a mountain of shit, or find yourself up shit creek without a paddle. Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit and other times you fall in a bucket of shit and come out smelling like a rose. When you stop to consider all the facts, it's the basic building block of the English language. And remember, once you know your shit, you don't need to know anything else!! You could pass this alo ng, if you give a shit; or not do so if you don't give a shit! Well, Shit, it's time for me to go. Just wanted you to know that I do give a shit and hope you had a nice day, without a bunch of shit. But, if you happened to catch a load of shit from some shit-head........ Well, Shit Happens!!!

Stretch your brain

This is not a test - just a phenomenon. All readings are explained.
Read out loud the text inside the triangle below.

More than likely you said, "A bird in the bush,"! and. ......
if this IS what YOU said, then you failed to see
that the word THE is repeated twice!
Sorry, look again.

Next, let's play with some words.
What do you see?

 

In black you can read the word GOOD, in white the word EVIL (inside each black letter is a white letter). It's all very physiological too, because it visualize the concept that good can't exist without evil (or the absence of good is evil).  Now, what do you see?
 

 

You may not see it at first, but the white spaces read the word optical, the blue landscape reads the word illusion. Look again! Can you see why this painting is called an optical illusion?

What do you see here?

 

This one is quite tricky!
The word TEACH reflects as LEARN.

 Last one.

What do you see?

 

You probably read the word ME in brown, but.......
when you look through ME you will see YOU!

Do you need to look again?    Test Your Brain

  This is really cool. The second one is amazing so please read all the way though.
                               
ALZHEIMERS' EYE TEST
 
Count every " F " in the following text:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RE
SULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTI
FIC STUDY COMBINED WITH
THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS...
(SEE BELOW)

  HOW MANY ?

WRONG, THERE ARE 6 -- no joke.

READ IT AGAIN !
Really, go Back and Try to find the 6 F's before you scroll down.
 
The reasoning behind is further down.
The brain cannot process "OF".
         
Incredible or what? Go back and look again!!
Anyone who counts all 6 "F's" on the first go is a genius. 

             
Three is normal, four is quite rare.

Send this to your friends.
It will drive them crazy.!
And keep them occupied
For several minutes..!

 

More Brain Stuff . .  From Cambridge University .

Olny srmat poelpe can raed tihs.
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty  uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig  to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs psas it on  !!
 
Psas Ti ON !

 

It wasn't very good week. First my Mother and Kasia left. On Tuesday my house got broken in. They cleaned me up good, but the laptop TV stereo can be replaced. What pisses me off the most is that lost all my pictures... Four years of work by now probably got deleted.

Like this wasn't enough today I blew my knee and this feels pretty serious, I can't walk. What do they say?... when it rains it pures..

1) I hate to talk about myself
2) Art, beauty and genius makes me cry
3) I can go without  sleep for days
4) Until my 8 birthday, I have spend at least part of my vacation in a hospital
5) In 12th (sorry originaly I wrote 8th) grade I convinced my male classmates to take naked picture of ourselves as a goodbye gift to all girls
6) No one outside of Poland can pronounce neither my first or last name.
7) I want to move to New Zealand
8) I almost never call

I don't watch enough TV to have a meaningful conversation in a local bar, but I've stumbled into this video. You don't have to like opera, turn up the volume and enjoy. And it is also nice to see Simons jaw drop

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1k08yxu57NA

I'm bored out of my mind. My work became standstill. Geniuses on the top decided to 'take closer look' and have put on hold all new projects. I have finished any meaningful work something like week and a half ago and have nothing new coming down the pipe. I'm seriously thinking about finding a broom and starting to sweep the office.

It is sort off funny, because when I was working 10 -12 hours days I was dreaming that something like this would happen and now I'm going crazy.

I'm tired of browsing internet, I even went to Craig’s list to see if I can find someone interesting to flirt with (must be a spring you know) all responses (indirect I guess) were to enlarge my penis or letters from desperate Russian woman, who are dying to write to me. I'm sure all those are written by some Russian, unshaved mafia guy who in the end will try to get some money from me for a ticket.

I don't even feel like getting drunk. Maybe it is time to find a new job....

 

 

Seems like for some strange reason, I’ve became very popular with young (very) members of the Buzznet family. I got quiet a few requests and notes that you have added me as a friend. It is very flattering, and I’m glad you enjoy my posts and photography, and I want you to visit….,but please don’t feel offended if I don’t add you as my friend. I just don’t feel comfortable having 15 or 17 year old on my list, besides you don’t want an old prick in ‘your’ world and the consciousness of my presence there would not make me comfortable. I’ve made a couple exceptions, but I would like to keep it like that, an exception.  I hope you can understand. Peace.

 

Mr. UtahJ

 

Hello friends,

I will be gone for a while, again. Not for as long as last time, maybe a month,  but still gone... A lot of shit is about to happen, so I need to concentrate on some 'important' stuff. Keep your fingers crossed for me, because despite being a surviavor and always landing on four paws (my cat like quality) I could use some positive energy.

I'll see you all soon

Utah

I'm back, not 100% yet but getting closer. I want to thank all you who wrote to me and expressed concern or encouraged me to come back.  I’m sorry I didn’t reply, but you know…..I really have no good excuse.

I had some problems and went trough one of my 'dry' inspiration spells (last time it lasted 3 years, so this time is not that bad:)) Life have been good and bad and so, so just a life.

I'm still in Phoenix and just bought a new (old) house. I will be moving this weekend so if anyone would like to give me a hand I offer free beer:) Also if anyone of you visits the desert you will have a place to stay.

I got to go now, but I'll see you soon,

Utah